The World Poker Tour has decided it has had enough of dwindling viewer numbers, and after months of research, their study group has discovered what the public demands is more action. With a huge increase in revenue from contact sports such as mixed martial arts and boxing, violence could be on the cards soon at the WPT. A spokesperson for the WPT had this to say “There’s just not enough action at the card tables these days, before people used to argue and insult each other, and before that, they used to shoot each other. Nowadays most of the players have come straight from the internet, they have absolutely no social skills, let alone fighting skills this has made for very boring television.”
After several meetings between the WPT, and the Health and Safety Advisory Board, both parties agreed that violence was the answer. The conclusion they came to is that only dealers should be allowed to carry guns, but that each player is issued with a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire as they receive their chips.
The rules are simple when it is a players turn to act a countdown clock of 30 seconds begins. If a player has not made a decision by the time the clock goes “Beep” the remaining players at the table are allowed to use their bats to “negotiate” with the acting player. If after a further 30 seconds the player has still not made a decision the dealer then shoots them and their hand is declared dead.
One of the main organisers for the WPT said they were very excited about the introduction of the new rules “We trialed it rigorously, and during the testing phase what we found was that players were either seriously injured or acted on time, no one was killed, it really brought a whole new dynamic to the game.” If the players of the last WPT are anything to go by viewers can expect fast paced action or swift justice this time around. Let the games begin.