Game of Cards

Shock, Rage, and Disappointment in Phil Hellmuth’s sitting room last week as he sat and watched Game of Thrones only to witness Daenerys Stormborn, Mother of Dragons, The Unburnt, Breaker of Chains, Blah, Blah, Blah, burn out a huge chunk of the Lannister army and relieve them of their gold.

The events unfolded around 9.30pm on HBO when the Lannister army had just taken a huge pot of gold from the Tyrells, only to be confronted heads up by Daenerys, who then went on to win the pot. Hellmuth could be heard shouting in his sitting room from over two blocks away “She called a raise with a queen and a dragon, A QUEEN AND A DRAGON, some idiot Targaryen.” Phil’s wife could be heard saying, now dear it’s just a game to which Phil replied “Honey are you serious, it’s just a game? Game of Thrones is my life, I’ve been predicting the outcome of the last six seasons and now this? I mean come on she called a raise with a queen and a dragon and they had a set of armies, she’s there now she’s got all the gold, she’s probably going to be dead in another few episodes, I mean it’s just so sick where do HBO find these idiots from. She called a raise with a queen and a dragon.

After thirty minutes Phil’s wife gave him “The Look” which indicated to him from previous experience if he did not cease and desist his rant he would be spending the rest of the night out in the back yard. Hellmuth then took to Twitter to voice his concerns about the episode, while simultaneously trying to promote his new book “Poker Brat” soon after HBO responded by Tweeting “It was an aggressive call”. Fortunately for everyone following, Phil’s battery ran out of charge on his phone due to excessively showing off his 360-degree camera and finally the world returned to peace.

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