Donald Trump revealed today that he is a massive poker fan, and was quoted as saying “The world is a poker table and it’s time to go all in.” After attending morning prayer at the Masjid Muhammad Mosque in Washington el presidente Trump took some time for a brief press conference saying he had always enjoyed a good game of no limit Texas Holdem, and had started up a regular Thursday night game in the oval office.
When asked about the current state of online poker he said “This is exactly what happens when you put a foreigner in the white house, they try to destroy our culture I am tired of it, and the American people are tired of it. If we want to stay up until five o clock in the morning playing poker we should be allowed to, I’m the president for god’s sake I should be allowed to stay up as late as I want.
Senor Trump then went on to pledge that online poker would be coming back as soon as he drained the swamp, and built the wall which is presumably a gardening project he is working on at the white house. He then went on to say “Its going to be great you are going to love it. Pokerstars, Full Tilt and all the rest of them their all coming back, it’s going to be fabulous, you’ll be that entertained you won’t have time to urinate, this is exactly why the American people voted for me because I can see the things that other people can’t. See I’m like an owl in a mirror woo woo.”
At this point several secret service security staff rushed forward and pulled hombre trump from reporters, and threw him into a nearby waiting car which drove off at speed. Will the president come forward with his promise of a return to online poker, we will have to wait and see.